cardiobitch @ 2008-03-23T12:31:00

2008-03-23T11:38:53Z

fucking hell
my kitchen is a minefield. its even worse than easter eggs, its pure decadence from my family.

how satisfying it'll be to watch them stuff themselves (while i eat a boiled egg.)

cardiobitch @ 2007-08-02T21:15:00

2007-08-02T12:20:37Z

I ate a lot today, well 700 cal. Now im feeling sick, food is vicious and grapes+water is a very bad combination. My stomach is about to explode. My stomach is expanding...so tomorrow back to 400 a day for 2 other weeks, then we'll see.

I want to be at 45 kg (100 lbs) on the 15th of August. The next time im weighing myself is on the 12th ..checking it every day is too depressing.

NUMBER 1.

2007-07-31T11:30:33Z

Hey everyone, 1st post ever!

This is quite exciting, reading your posts was motivating so I hope writing this journal will help me even more. For a beginning I'd like to introduce my version of 'pro-anorexia' , clarify a few points and at last let you know me a bit better in a list:

1-I don't think anorexia itself is good - the As Ive had eating disorders in the past to me it's as strange to me as saying that someone is 'pro-cancer' . Some girls do die from it but I definitely agree that pro-anorexia is a lifestyle. A lifestyle because I will always be careful with everything that will enter my mouth and remember the content of my calorie counter books... even when I stop being on 400 calories a day.

2 - I think its a lifestyle that finds more gratification in the absence of food rather than the little we get.

3 - I am not obsessed with food and it doesn't tarnish my whole life to feel fat because I am active about it.

4 - I believe 400-600 calories a day is not dangerous if you drink lots of water, take good supplements and not choose your daily allowance to be 3 bars of Bounty.

5- When I wake up, I feel happy that at least there's something I'm going to do right today (losing weight !)

6- I think I lost any interest in what I call 'useless' food that won't even fill me up, give me protein or vitamins or whatever.

7 - I love inventing skinnyfying recipes (recipe is a big word - lets say mixtures!)

8 - It motivates me to think that our appetite gets smaller every day and that we start thinking like the 'naturally skinny': a few bites is enough - no need to finish a meal - its better to throw the rest in the bin than using our stomach as a bin. Hunger becomes a part of us - we mind it less and less.

9- We have amazing discipline and we should never feel the need to purge even if we slipped a bit.

10 - I do not restrict myself because I'm vain or stupid. We all have the right to want to feel better in our own skin and have our own idea of perfection and beauty (and this is probably the same as most people's today anyway) and just because we're pro-ana doesn't mean we want to be so skinny we won't look human anymore.

11- I really love exercising, makes me feel like my body isn't actually so useless (even if lately ive been a bit weak)

At last some stats! I'm 5'4 and 106 pounds
( was 123 pounds at the end of 2006,lost veeeerry slowly (to 116 pounds), and during the last few weeks, went from a fat 1500 cal da day to a 400-600 which finally led to real results.)

If you think like me, get in touch and we can support each other! I am sure that this type of support - plus real life thinspiration - will help us lots.

Ill post some pictures of me soon that will make my journal more 'real'.

Thanks for reading, talk to you v soon!

xxxx

The Cardio Bitch

cardiobitch @ 2008-03-23T12:31:00

cardiobitch @ 2007-08-02T21:15:00

NUMBER 1.